There are a lot of things every guy should have in his closet: the right pair of slim cut dark jeans, a really good cashmere sweater, a great watch, and a pair of boots that are made to last among them. Not among them? Square toed shoes.
The Going Out Shirt
Some wardrobe segmentation is necessary: most of us still can’t get away with wearing our gym gear at the office. But to have a distinct separation between what you wear say, at brunch, and what you wear to get a drink on the weekends is a foolhardy waste of money. It’s too dark in most bars and nightclubs for anyone to notice the colorful stripes and light sheen of the standard going out shirt, so save yourself time, money, and the anguish of making a decision about what to wear to the club and just put on an oxford.
A trim pair of cargo pants entered the realm of acceptable mens trousers just after the financial crisis, when designers like Michael Bastian and the geniuses at J.Crew started turning out pairs that fit like a pair of great jeans. But their downtrodden cousin, the cargo short, is always going to be a no-go: they’re a surefire way to tell the world that you really are living a life of quiet desperation.
Darth Vader? On a tie? That you’re going to wear to an event? Grow the fuck up.
If you’re golfing, great: get your steps, close a deal, live your best life—and go ahead and wear one of those shiny, pima sateen pastel monstrosities we call golf shirts. If you’re not golfing, and you want to express the same kind verve for luxurious leisure that comes across for guys who have legitimate reasons to wear golf shirts? Wear a polo and call it a day.
Super Ripped Denim
Feel free to disagree here, but we at Men’s Journal are denim purists who like to buy a pair of raw denim jeans and wear the hell out of them until we’ve earned their distressed look. Purchasing a pre-distressed pair (especially one that’s so shredded apart that it looks like you got into a fight with a school of piranhas) makes a man look like the laziest try hard in the world. And what’s worse? They’re not even trendy anymore